It's a real rollercoaster ride and I feel like the ups are manufactured but the downs are real. It is really hard to stay upbeat during this. I feel like I am on the sidelines watching my friends and coworkers continue along without me. I have been here since July and it sucks. On the upside, I am going through physio for my herniated disc, but until my back/leg improves, I can't just jump on my bike for a ride to try to cheer myself up and that is killing me. The other day I even forgot the model of my Specialized bike! Crazy ;-) Why am I complaining?
I had another setback today. My white blood cell counts were so low that they couldn't give me chemo. I had my Herceptin IV as usual but the nurse said that this setback could extend the chemo another week (yeah, I know you say big deal... but that week is meaningful to me as it is the week of my company's annual conference that there was a slight possibility I could attend). However, if my white blood cell counts don't come up with this chemo, I might have to go on another course of chemo. I got a shot to boost my white blood cells before I left and a warning from the doctor to stay away from anyone sick, to call them immediately if I had a fever, etc. So, I am a little depressed. I just feel like I can't get a break lately.
But then, my life isn't that bad when I put it into perspective. How can I complain when there is an enormous disaster in Haiti? Please do what you can to help. If you text "HAITI" to 90999, you will make a $10 donation to the American Red Cross for relief for Haiti. It will come off of your phone bill.
Thanks,
Mo
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hang in there mo. i know it's tough at times and even though it seems like your friends are moving on without you, we're not. i think about you everyday. can't wait to hop on the bike and ride with you again. just let me know when and i'll be there. meanwhile, let's get together and do some other mundane things. i'll shoot you an email about this weekend.
ReplyDeleteThere's nothing worse than setbacks when you are putting in so much effort. Although it's not as bad as Haiti, or your battle for that matter, I just finished with a month long custody trial only to have the judge rule that she didn't have jurisdiction (the authority) to hear the case so she wasn't going to make a decision.
ReplyDeleteLately I've been thinking about how much I miss the old gang. Let's get together. We could go on a picnic and pretend we are on a mtb ride, eating, as usual.
Hi Mo:
ReplyDeleteHaiti puts all things in perspective, but don't feel bad about feeling bad. Your yeoman's effort will come to something, for sure. Glad to hear you'll be able to move your bod soon. I'm sure that will lift your spirits -- but may shock you with how hard it is. I'm thinking of you all the time. Much love, sistah.